Friday, October 25, 2013

I'm an activist?

I think it is freaking funny that I am such a "love your body" activist because let's be honest I did NOT love my body for a long time. In fact some days I still hate my body. I look in the mirror and I see that fat roll or that cellulite and it literally makes me nauseous. Ali sees the look I give myself and  he has to tell me I'm beautiful just how I am. (He also tells me he likes "thick" girls so sometimes it doesn't help)
But honestly I know I am damn fine. I look at old pictures of myself and think wow I sure have changed and what changed was not only my appearance but what is on the inside. I am more positive now about my life. I know I can do things I couldn't do a year ago. Heck I ran three 5ks in the past year. I went hiking. I went shooting. I went to CUBA and walked EVERYWHERE! I just think it's crazy that I can do this.
And guess what I'm not a size two. I'm a 14 or 12 on a good day. I bounce between 209 and 215. I have lumps and bumps. I have sooo many stretch marks. But you know what I am so sexy I know I am. I just have to remind myself.